Ember's Birthday party

I had Ember's birthday party yesterday, not sure how I pulled off everything on 5 hours of sleep give or take but it was a good time. Good food, good people there, and the kids had a blast and a LOT of sugar.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Isolation

 I have been feeling so alone the last few days. I know that I am not, that God is always with me (in His Word and Communion) but He is also directing the hands and feet of His people. That is the piece that is missing. I don't know if it's me being such an introvert, not reaching out to people or people just don't know how to approach me because they can't relate to what I am going through. It's not to say no one is trying at all, there have been some people reaching out once in a while but as time has passed, that has dropped off as well. The offers for me to 'reach out if I need anything' are ok but I don't really know what I need still.  I am planning to go back to work on Monday, reduced hours to start, and people keep telling me that will help but I am not sure about going back, even 3 months later. I keep hearing how strong I am, but it's all I can do to not cry every day or get in a huge fight with at least one of my daughters. I don't kn...
Read more

Addiction

This is just a jumble of thoughts I wrote out today to try and put a finger on how I'm feeling..some were spoken out loud, some were not. Feeling like: drowning - stuck in the trap of sin, starting to doubt my salvation; am I throwing it away? Even though I repent I still go back to the bottle night after night.. I'm drowning in guilt - is that a sign that God is still with me? I can't tell anymore. I feel trapped in darkness, crushed, falling apart, LOST. I fooled myself into thinking I could "cut back" on the drinking, just ended up right back where I was before. I fill my mornings with God's word, but the nights with the 'escape' (what am I trying to escape anyway?) I find in the wine glass; don't even care about eating, just give me one more drink. I'm not strong enough, but I just feel alone. I was feeling very worn. (http://life1025.com/songs/worn/ - this song is just about dead on)  I received words of encouragement from my p...
Read more

Realization

I just had a realization, after a couple conversations over the last few days. One with a co-worker regarding my older daughter who is autistic, and also going through puberty. She said that God wouldn't have given her to me if I couldn't handle it. One (it wasn't really a conversation, more a statement) from my younger daughter - we were watching something on Food network and someone was using mussels and she declared "mussels? I love those". This is coming from a day my husband had made mixed seafood alfredo with shrimp, mussels, calamari and Ember's advice to me was just to try the mussels and she was right. Putting these two things together this morning, the awareness came to me that my co-worker was right. Aiyana is in my life to teach me patience and kindness over impatience and anger; Ember is in my life to get me out of my comfort zone and to try new things. Thank God for them and the lessons they can teach me.
Read more